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...bailey's story...
Our story is a story about a MIRACLE. It is not the kind of miracle that is so often shared in Christian circles. We have heard stories about untreatable cancer that disappeared and of a child that was never supposed to walk or talk and is now a healthy adult. These are often the kinds of stories people share with you when you are experiencing difficult circumstances. Stories about the TRAGEDY that was avoided or the near miss that is now in the rear view mirror of life. We value these types of stories and we CELEBRATE them!
Ours was not that kind of story. Our daughter Bailey Hope was born on February 20, 2009. She died on August 13, 2010. The eighteen months in between were horrible and heart wrenching as we experienced our worst fears coming true. We were not rescued FROM heartache and tragedy.
Our miracle was that we were joined IN this journey by friends and family that gave of themselves and by our GOD who held us in unexplainable ways. This is our story. We do not share it to garner pity. There are others who have similar stories. There are so many others who have more tragic stories.
We share our story because it is impossible to talk about our beautiful daughter, without talking about our beautiful God. We must talk about our daughter. We must talk about our God. It is the MIRACLE behind the MIRACLE.
Firsts
As a parent you dream about all kinds of firsts. First smiles, first words, first steps, first birthdays, and first days of school. A few days ago, I came across Bailey's baby book, and I was confronted once again with the harsh reality of all the firsts we never had, or ever will have with our precious daughter.
Through my tears, I was reflecting on this past year of firsts. The kind you pray that you will never experience. The first birthdays, holidays, anniversaries, and family photos without your precious loved one present. After lots of tears (and believe me there were a lot) I called my best friend. First he just listened and then he said, "Heather, our beautiful daughter is the first to experience pure joy, she is the first to sit at Jesus' feet, she has experienced the best kind of firsts." I was so grateful for Matt's words, they brought me such comfort, and a much needed perspective.
We have lived through a lot of our firsts without Bailey, and while we desperately miss her presence, her sweet coos, and delicate curls. We praise God daily that he rescued our beautiful daughter from her suffering.
We miss you Bailey, and we can't wait to experience "firsts" with you in Heaven.
bailey's firsts in heaven continue to keep our hearts heavenward...while we grieve the loss of her firsts that never came while she was here. thank you for sharing this perspective. you both continue to amaze us. bailey continues to impact us...
ReplyDeletewe love you.
ben and jaren
Matt and Heather Steve and I think of you often and I am stopping in this moment to pray and thank God for the people of grace and faith that you are. Thank you for sharing something so painfully in such a profound and beautiful way. Wish I was living in GR and could come over and give you a big hug. Love to each of you,
ReplyDeleteSarah (Steve & Emerson too!)
Thank you. I've been praying, hoping, that you had the strength to reach out beyond the grief to come back to this site - to share with us. There are still so many people that come here to continue walking this path with you. We love you and so very much appreciate the gift you've given the world through sharing your journey. We are all hugging you and continuing to pray for your family.
ReplyDeleteI think of your family often and I just pray that you continue to find a little more peace every day. I see my sweet boys at Jesus' feet with Bailey and it's SO comforting. Thank you for sharing.
ReplyDelete"We praise God daily that he rescued our beautiful daughter from her suffering."
ReplyDeleteWhat a relief.
To know no suffering.
There is no greater grief than that known by a parent who loses a child. To know your child is suffering is perhaps second only to this. To know that your child is resting - without pain, without suffering - is a great relief. A heart wrenching but welcomed relief.
How lucky you are to have as your best friend the man whom you married!! THAT dear friend is one of the BEST blessings EVER.
"Jesus is my portion."
ReplyDeleteAre you feeling full today?
Thinking of you!!
It strikes me as amazing how often I come here soon after my twin leaves a comment. Your girls will forever be connected in the most amazing ways...
ReplyDeleteLoving you.