I'm not the best communicator but none the less i wanted to share with you what God has been teaching me through my children and especially Bailey during the past weeks.
... On september 14th Bailey had her pediatric opthamology appointment. During our visit the doctor performed a series of tests on Bailey in order to determine how much her vision was affected by her brain injury. Unfortunately Bailey's vision has been greatly affected and she is considered legally blind. Although this wasn't a huge suprise to Matt and I, there is still intense sorrow that goes along with this news. I have felt discouraged, hopeless, angry, and sad that my precious Bailey may never see our faces, or smiles. Bailey will probably never taste ice cream, or eat strawberries, she may never be able to tell me how she is feeling, sing "Jesus loves me," or say "MOM," she will most likely never walk, ride a bike, or dance around with her brother and sisters. However, in the midst of this grief Bailey is giving me a new perspective and is showing me what beautiful really is.
...There are a number of moments throughout my day when it is easy to become frustrated. For instance when Carter and Mckenzie track in mud for the third time that day, or when they spill their spaghetti on the floor, or voice their strong will/opinions (which are typically different from mine) in very loud and passionate ways. Because of Bailey I realize there is beauty in these moments. Carter and McKenzie are able to play in the mud, they are able to eat orally, they can eat things like spaghetti, or ice cream, or strawberries. They are also able to talk and reason and express their opinions. As frustrating as these moments as a mother can be, I would give anything for Bailey to be able to do these things.
...Thank you Bailey for teaching me to see the beauty in things, and for helping me to become a better Mom! You are truly BEAUTIFUL!!
... On september 14th Bailey had her pediatric opthamology appointment. During our visit the doctor performed a series of tests on Bailey in order to determine how much her vision was affected by her brain injury. Unfortunately Bailey's vision has been greatly affected and she is considered legally blind. Although this wasn't a huge suprise to Matt and I, there is still intense sorrow that goes along with this news. I have felt discouraged, hopeless, angry, and sad that my precious Bailey may never see our faces, or smiles. Bailey will probably never taste ice cream, or eat strawberries, she may never be able to tell me how she is feeling, sing "Jesus loves me," or say "MOM," she will most likely never walk, ride a bike, or dance around with her brother and sisters. However, in the midst of this grief Bailey is giving me a new perspective and is showing me what beautiful really is.
...There are a number of moments throughout my day when it is easy to become frustrated. For instance when Carter and Mckenzie track in mud for the third time that day, or when they spill their spaghetti on the floor, or voice their strong will/opinions (which are typically different from mine) in very loud and passionate ways. Because of Bailey I realize there is beauty in these moments. Carter and McKenzie are able to play in the mud, they are able to eat orally, they can eat things like spaghetti, or ice cream, or strawberries. They are also able to talk and reason and express their opinions. As frustrating as these moments as a mother can be, I would give anything for Bailey to be able to do these things.
...Thank you Bailey for teaching me to see the beauty in things, and for helping me to become a better Mom! You are truly BEAUTIFUL!!
Ahhhhh..........lovely.
ReplyDeletevery beautifully said! thinking and praying for you often!
ReplyDeletemuch love,
ashley
i'm writing this in my heart...to cherish the moments with olivia...the times where i think i will come unglued-and instead be grateful that she is able to dump the moon sand on the floor...color her belly blue...play her slide whistle as loud as she can. i will be beautiful in these moments because of you sweet bailey!
ReplyDeleteHeather, don't know if you remember me or not? Tonya shared your blog address on Facebook. I haven't stopped thinking about you since I read this. I just want to tell you I have no idea what you are going through, and I'm sure it can't be easy, but I am so awed at your faith and trust in our Lord. Your family is beautiful. I appreciated this post especially b/c how many times have I felt that way about my kids making messes, or being stinkers? We sure take them for granted. So thanks for that reminder. I will lift you up in prayer to our Sovereign Lord. Have you heard the song "Bring the Rain" by MercyMe? Reading your story brought that song to my mind. God bless you.
ReplyDeleteBible study is focusing on plumb lines right now and your story gives us all a moment to examine what that means in our lives, how we can respond to adversity and blessings.
ReplyDeleteI've come back to read your post over and over again as I reflect on plumb - especially at those moments when my little lovelies are being, well less than lovely. I vow to find joy in those moments... You inspire me to be a better mom.