Joy and Pain

Thank you friends for the love and support that you have given. Heather and I wanted to update you all on how the girls are doing and to ask for your prayers:

Friday: Heather was in our doctors office on Friday (February 20^th) for a routine non stress test the week before our babies were to be delivered. One of the babies started to show signs of distress with a heart rate that would periodically drop. The doctor performed an ultrasound that showed she had very little amniotic fluid and in addition had her umbilical cord wrapped around her neck three times. Although these did not require an emergency cesarean delivery it was time for us to meet our girls face to face. After months of waiting and anticipation our beautiful baby girls arrived. Alexis was born first and weighted 6 lbs. Bailey was born two minutes later and weighed 5 lbs. Bailey needed a little encouragement to begin breathing on her own but this is not uncommon and she was doing well. Both the girls got the usual care complete with their first baths, foot printing (they actually fit on the cards this time), bracelets and cuddle time on one well deserving mom. After a few hours of holding the girls, giving kisses and taking pictures we checked the girls into the nursery for a few hours of sleep.

Saturday: At four in the morning Heather and I were woken by the neo-natal doctor (Neonatologist) who told us that the nurse had observed some unusual things with Bailey and that she had been moved to the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) because she was suffering seizures. The medications that she was given over the next several hours to control the seizures sedated her to the point that she was no longer able to breathe on her own and she was intubated. Over the next few hours she was transferred from Saint Mary’s Hospital to Spectrum Health NICU where they would be able to perform an MRI with the breathing tube in place.

Sunday: During the first day that we were in the NICU at Devos Bailey had a CT scan and an EEG which both seemed to suggest that things were going well. The EEG suggested that the medication was controlling the seizures, and the MRI suggested that if there was brain damage that it was most likely mild.

Monday: Both the girls seemed to be doing well. Heather and Alexis were discharged from Saint Mary’ Hospital. Bailey was adjusting to the medication and was able to breathe on her own so the tube was removed and Heather was able to finally come in see her for the first time since Saturday. Late on Monday night Bailey was finally taken for an MRI which would probably give us a clearer picture of the extent of the injury she had sustained.

Tuesday: A series of doctors including the pediatric neurologists reported the MRI showed that the extent of the brain damage was much more extensive than was originally thought. The neurologist believes that within the week preceding the delivery Bailey suffered a massive brain injury. This injury was primarily the result of the twin to twin transfusion syndrome that had been going which was complicated by the umbilical cord being wrapped around her neck. Bailey shows extensive damage to every part of her brain with the exception of the brain stem. As a result Bailey will most likely never walk or talk and developmentally will stay in an infantile or pre-infantile state.

While the immediate urge we feel is to pray for a miraculous healing of Bailey, and we certainly do, perhaps the miracle has already taken place. Heather and I are able to hold this beautiful baby girl who has survived so much as well as her sister. Our God is good. Not in a cliché way but in a way that allows you to breathe that next breath. Through the pain we cling to his promise not to make level paths before us, but rather to make our feet capable of standing upon the heights.

Heather and i have thought often of our wonderful friends who said that hard things can make you bitter or better, and we choose better. We have seen these same friends not only pledge to be better, but also live out this pledge. This is our desire. Today through the pain and grief that comes with the loss of the dreams of an expected future we choose better. Tomorrow we will try to choose the same. We reserve the right to choose moments, hours or even days of bitter but our God is good.

As you pray for us, please remember a few specific things. First, that Bailey would learn to suck so that she may be able to take food by mouth instead of need a feeding tube permanently. Second, that she would develop the ability to regulate her body temperature as this can be a common complication of this extensive of an injury. Third, please pray that we would have the strength and ability to live in the present instead of fearing the future. Fourth, please pray for McKenzie and Carter, that they feel loved...as much of our time in the next month will necessarily be spent caring for Bailey and Alexis.